that time it blizzarded.

blizzarded is a lot like foggin'. I make up weather words. YOU'RE WELCOME.

seriously, winter shouldn't even be a thing. why is snow real.

anyways, lots has happened over the past week. and I mean a lot. A LOT YA'LL. let me just say that three times in one sentence/fucked up paragraph to make sure you know what I'm saying. is this even a paragraph? hell if I know. Last I heard (in 3rd grade) it has to have 3-5 sentences and a point. This might hit the sentence requirement, but a point? yeah well, you win some you lose some.

first things first, my time with Kevin at Plank has came to an end. It was just that time, and my schedule is about to get nuts, especially with this damn blizzard and volunteering and working and just life in general. I really can't say enough good things about him or that gym though. seriously. Our last workout included some bangin back squats, this weird version of a plank and lots of other stuff.

On Friday I got to meet one of my favorite instagrammers of all time, and she happens to be on Darin's team. Nicole Ozminaaaa! seriously her last name isn't spelled like that and much like my spelling, that workout was ridiculous, but I had a lot of fun with her. I legit burned 850 calories with nothing but weights. no cardio. though, the end of the workout included 300 body weight squats. I know you all know what I was thinking. I kinda would have rather climbed to the top of that rock climbing wall with no harness and jumped off and hoped I broke my neck. Just kidding, there's no way I would have ever made it to the top of the rock climbing wall. but anything can happppppennnnnn. imagine me singing that like Ellie Golding. You can't picture that? me either. There were also smith machine sumos and plié squats. Then we did cardio after that. yay cardio. said no one ever.

Then Saturday, I took this shit show on the road, to Charlotte. I stayed with Jer and I worked out with one of the trainers there. Then afterwords we went to rock bottom and ate. I had this thing of chicken, mac and cheese, green onions and bacon mixed together and shit it was delicious. and donut holes. and a drank. I hadn't had any kind of alcohol in probably a year. and let's be clear, I'm 24. I don't need my mama's permission to drink, so if you feel like you need to get your snitch on and to tell her, well kindly shut your blow hole and get a life. mmk? glad we cleared that up. Pretty sure she reads this trash on the weekly. Actually I know she does because every so often she wants me to remind my readers that I was raised better than to talk/act like this. So did ya'll hear that? it's not her fault, mama said hide your crazy and act like a lady, and well, I do neither. and that's what makes me everyone's favorite twin. HOLLA.

THEN, yesterday, yours truly purchased an ellipitical. whaaaat? I know. cardio all day son. all day. just kidding. I just suck and haven't been doing more than half of what I should be because I just hate being at the gym for 400 hours a day and so I decided to use a slice of my tax return money for something useful. at the time of this writing, I AM DONE. DONE. DONE. I have ghetto-ly rigged the display to stay on the thing because I can't get the baby screws in the display because my eyes are terrible. My diddy (dad) is going to come over Saturday after this damn blizzard and fix it for me. He used to be a carpenter and in my world, that means he can fix everything. He built houses (all of it, I don't know specifically what he did) so I'm sure he can fix an elliptical. I got it for like 280 bucks with taxes and while I can't change the incline, the resistance setting. shit. level 4 of 6 and I was like WHAT. See my instagram/facebook picture if you want to see what it looks like but I'm guessing ya'll know what an elliptical is.

anyways, I'm pretty much stranded at my apartment. woe is me, right? um general housekeeping announcement; I think tomorrow or Friday is Valentines day, so if you're in love with me now is the time to speak up. with that, I'm off to watch some Netflix and eat some pizza I MEAN CARROTS. ha. I'll leave you to figure out what I'm eating for lunch. It'll be a new game called what is vanessa eating for lunch. Promise I'm not drunk right now, I'm just really bored. So if anyone wants to be friends, I'll be here all day.