being a beginner.

One day my life will settle down and there will be no need for this blog...

but you know what, I hope that doesn't happen anytime soon. because I'm having FUN now.

problem #1 my hands are straight prison jacked. they're cut up like a bad kilo of cocaine on a blue light special. see what I did there? this is where we at.

So, put on your shocked faces. I did push ups and didn't complain. WHAT. I seriously, I don't even know what's happening to me. I've fallen in LOVE with Olympic lifting and I will do whatever to make it happen. if that means push ups, that's okay. I even did them tonight on my own without someone telling me to. ARE WE IN NARNIA? we must be somewhere magical because that is a miracle in and of itself. I was actually just too scared to complain hahahaha.  I've been lifting at Asheville Strength and it's pretty damn awesome if I do say so myself. I'm still in my "deer in the headlights" stage of getting to know people. I probably look terrified the whole time but what I love is that it's fun. There's no group workout, you just show up, do your work, have fun and leave. I did my very first prowler pushes yesterday, I also learned to snatch, not crossfit style. 2 hours there doesn't feel ANYTHING like 2 hours at The Rush. 45 minutes there and I'm DONE. The best part? how I feel when I leave Asheville Strength. Like I've accomplished something and I have a goal in mind and it's actually attainable in not 100 years. I think so, at least. Some days I get a little/lot miffed that I've let myself backslide so much and then I remember that I'm human, and this does. not. end. with a number on a scale. When I see 150 (I'm just throwing out numbers) that doesn't mean it's back to mountain dews and poptarts. Maintenance is a whole new beast. I'm just really, really happy with the way things are going right now. Today was weigh in, and I lost 1.4 pounds, bringing me up to minus 8 in 3 weeks, which is pretty good. I even had a few bad days, and by bad days I mean not so good dinners, but 1 meal doesn't make or break you...for me, at least. One of the hardest things I'm dealing with right now is letting myself be a beginner. I don't know everything and I won't know everything. Being a beginner is rough, because I feel like no one else at the gym is even half as bad as me right now, but I kept telling myself last night. Is it anyone else's 2nd night? just you? OKAY. CHILL OUT. No one is expecting Holly Mangold. Chill. the. fuck. out. I feel like such an uncoordinated jackass, and I need to work on aggression...and well, if you know me, aggression is the last thing I think you would see from me. It's just not my thing, at all, ever.

I will say this. I am sore as FUCK. My traps, abs, shoulders and calves feel like they're going to FALL OFF. I get on edge when someone even gets close to touching my traps at the moment. Stand too close to me at work and see how fast I move away from you. I'm really being a huge baby, but seriously. Snatches are the only thing that's hit them that hard. I have some mobility work to do tonight and well, I'm blogging right now. haha, I just know a lacrosse ball anywhere near my shoulders/traps/calves is going to be a real treat.

Anyways, I'm off to a hot Epsom salt bath with watermelon bubble bath in it because well, I'm 18 I do what I want. and by 18 I mean almost 25. Damn. I'm getting old. But that's all for this episode of wow, it's almost been 2 years and she's still blogging and I'm still reading. So who's the real winner here? I'll let you decide :)